Hand Jive
February 25th, 20104 comments Posted in See Jane Shop
It’s winter.
I’m old.
But I don’t need to tell you that, because my hands tell the story well enough.
Enter, hand cream.
I remember wondering what the hell was up with the ubiquitous Jergens lotion ads on tv and in magazines. Inevitably, my mother had a tube of Nivea in her purse. Even more recently like in the last 15 years because when you’re 42, 15 years becomes “recent,” I noticed that the wife on Everybody Loves Raymond whose name I can’t be bothered to look up even though I know that her REAL name is Patricia Heaton and she’s very open about having lots of plastic surgery puts hand cream on every night before bed. And not that this is remotely relevant or anything, but that always bugged me. If you’re going to read in bed, you should put the hand goo on AFTER you read, otherwise the pages will get all smudgy, right? Right.
I get it now, though.
My two favorite options are from Bliss: High Intensity Hand Cream
and Aveda: Hand Relief
And they work equally well, aren’t greasy, but are sort of luxurious enough that you feel like you’ve staved off Wicked Witch of the West scaly claws for a day or so. The only real choice you have to make here is which one smells better to you, and since there’s no such thing as smellavision or Internet Odorama, you’ll have to just take my word that the Bliss is light and a little citrusy, and the Aveda is a bit more intense and musky, but not in an overpowering or cloying way.
Stuff Other People Said:
Now You Talk
But be forewarned: if you get nasty, we reserve the right to delete your comment. Unless what you said was really stupid. Then we may just leave it up so people can take target practice. Pa-ching!
Hand jive and Jergens references.
Classy.
And why did Patricia Heaton decide to have her belly button removed? Give her her belly button back and you can lump her in with Jane Seymour and the Glade lady. Hot.
K I read everything and had a comment until…I read Dan said that someone had her navel removed?
WHAT?
Jenjen´s last blog ..Fluffs Plus with Tequila
It’s true. She had tons of surgery and apparently had to have it in stages so she didn’t have a belly button for a while. In between procedures she apparently went to The Beach That Celebrities Frequent to Get Publicity For Their “New” Bodies and they have pics of her in a bikini with NO BELLY BUTTON. It is so weird. It’s like those monkey sea creatures on the back of comic books that you could send away for. No belly buttons.
As for hand lotion, I’ve had rotten, dry skin and eczema for years. And, naturally, I cannot have anything with perfumes or additives. Which means I have to spend $$$ on hand cream and body cream. Which means my boys were lucky enough to inherit it from me.
The Domestic Goddess´s last blog ..An Open Letter to a Major Douchebag
here at my house where we are both dry and douches about petroleum in our products, we are huge fans of Aveda.
We are also big fans of dousing our hands and feet in Crisco (the solid kind) and wrapping them in Saran Wrap and covering them with socks. If you can stand it for a whole night, you will wake up with the hands and feet of a college kid