Wild at Heart
March 1st, 201010 comments Posted in Parenting, Pop Culture, Science, Wapatui
Jane says…
I feel a little bit like that stand-up comedian who carries on about why you park in the driveway and you drive on a parkway, but I’m plowing through the cliché anyway.
IT WAS A KILLER WHALE. WHAT THE HELL DID YOU EXPECT??
Anyone who has ever tried to contain a screaming toddler in an enclosed time-out space knows that attempting to keep wild things in captivity is a bad plan. Mother Nature is not a huge fan of the Zoo, or the Wild Animal Park, or the Sea World or Sea World derivative.
My dog is so utterly domesticated that she’s tried to sit in an easy chair and join in conversation during dinner parties. On more than one occasion. Nevertheless, that bitch still tries to bite my arm off if I make the foolhardy error of trying to take a hunk of rawhide away from her. Would you expect anything less from a tiger or lion or bear or predatory sea-dwelling mammal?
“But how do kids learn about animals if they can’t see them in zoos?” I’ve heard this before, and to those of you who would ask the question I say this, “Go away. You aren’t smart enough for me to talk to you.” PBS? The Discovery Channel? The Internet? Wait…wait…I got it…ready? Ready? Brace yourself…Books!!
Wild animals in captivity are entertainment, not education. Pretending otherwise is ludicrous. Zoos and the like exist for profit, not education. Certainly, there are conservation efforts that are supported by zoos, but I refuse to believe that kids wouldn’t be introduced to animals in such a way that they should grow up to care about their welfare if wild animals weren’t trapped and caged.
These animals don’t act like animals in the wild, and often they don’t even look like animals in the wild. They pace and develop other nervous tics, some dangerous to their physical health. They are often subject to changes in the environment to which they are unsuited – their cycles and rhythms are off. Without the opportunity to hunt, or be hunted, they aren’t fulfilling any evolutionary destiny or purpose either. They are bored. Taking another page from the toddler playbook, if you try to keep a bored toddler subdued for too long, you will end up maimed, or at least emotionally scarred.
Mother Nature will put up with a lot from us. But when she has something to say, she says it loud.
Note: I take my kids to the zoo. I’ve taken them to Sea World (boring and expensive). So, mommy’s a bit of a hypocrite. Mommy’s also a bit of a buzz kill, because the whole time we’re at the zoo, I’m pointing out how miserable the animals look, especially the elephants.
…but Dan thinks…
It’s funny. When we discussed our angles on this post, I was certain that for the first time, Jane and I were going to be on the same page. We were actually. going. to agree. I was considering calling The Guinness Book. But maybe that’s premature.
It’s not called a Snuggling Whale. A Happygoodtime Whale. It’s a killer. For prey like seals, they swim up from underneath them, wheel and swat them out of the water, into the air with their massive tails, knocking the seals unconscious; sometimes killing them with that single stroke. Then it’s lunchtime.
And they know how to hunt in groups. They are organized killers.
I love zoos. We have an annual membership to our local zoo and still find time to attend one or two others. For those that think that you can learn about the visceral experiences of life by reading about them or watching television, I’d suggest that they live pretty sheltered lives, and that thrown out into nature, those books will do little to help a person cope with dangerous encounters without real-life experience to back it up. Unless it’s a really heavy book and you have perfect aim.
In my basement I have a beautiful bearskin rug I got from my father, a bear he killed while out in the woods, hunting. He hadn’t been planning on it. Wasn’t even hunting for bear. But he was in the woods, saw a 250 pound black bear and tried his best to stay out of it’s way. And he did, right up until it smelled him, or smelled his prospective next meal, turned and charged at my father.
Tiny black eyes, enormous head, mouth agape, slobber dripping in anticipation as he lumbered toward my father.
Kill or be killed. Right there. My father raised his rifle, drew a bead and placed a slug between the bear’s eyes, dropping his would-be killer. There’s absolutely no way a book or a made-for-television movie can convey that pants-filling experience. But being able to see a live animal in a less-than-natural habitat can at least expose us, our kids, to the size and majesty and strength and potential danger of these animals.
I want to make sure this stays focused – this post isn’t about how terrible it is that animals are in captivity. At least that’s not what Jane and I discussed before we started writing. This post is about the arrogance, naivete and even stupidity of intentionally courting danger with animals that can kill.
Like the actor who thought he he could show the world how humane and lovable wild bears are, by embedding himself in their habitat, talking in falsetto to them, and then oops. Getting too close when food was scarce. Turns out that B-list actors are delicious.
Or Seigfried and Roy. “She was just trying to protect him.” Right. From not getting his head bitten off?
Or the three drunk guys in the Siberian zoo who decided to taunt the bears. And then one fell into the bear pit. Did you know whiskey makes an excellent marinade?
You can’t get the feel for rapelling down the side of a cliff, your stomach leaping into your throat, your bladder almost emptying as you look down, without actually strapping on the harness, leaning over that cliff, then jumping. But you do so knowing that if the rope is frayed, the harness unsecure or your technique is poor, you might plunge straight down to the rocks below.
So yes, it’s sad that that trainer lost her life to that killer whale. But as Jane and I said to each other in our post-planning meeting, “What’d you expect?”
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I have a slightly nuanced view of the situation. I think zoos provide real value in showing children the animals in a personal way that helps their concrete little minds appreciate them. HOWEVER – I think only those animals whose needs can reasonably be met in such a setting should be candidates. That’s going to always mean that dolphins of every species cannot be kept in captivity. The sights and sounds of the natural world are so much more accessible than they were when I was a child in the ’50s and we should be thinking of less invasive ways to enjoy the earth’s bounty.
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While i think that zoos can be a learning experience, the fact of the matter is that they still take animals out of their natural environment and put them in fake, plastic habitats for us to gawk at them. Ever watch some animals at the zoo? Depressing. Pacing. Sad. They are sad. And nervous and upset. They are bored.
Darwin had some good points. Survival of the fittest. And yet we insist on helping nature, interfering with natural selection, making reparations for the wrongs that humans have inflicted on the flora and fauna of the world. We’ve helped animals into extinction, to the point that the only way to see them is in zoos. Sad.
I’m with all y’all. WHAT THE HECK? It was a killer whale! Did they expect it to curl up in her lap purring? I mean, I’m sad for her but in a way I’m not because she died doing what she loved, knowing the risks and did it anyway. That’s poetic justice. How many people can say they died doing something they always dreamed of doing and loved? I’m wondering if I can die eating potatoes someday…
The Domestic Goddess´s last blog ..NUTS!
She had a fucking long pony tail. A tragic end for someone with bad hair. Zoos suck. But I did love getting licked by a giraffe once.
I know, a very intuitive response.
The Hussy´s last blog ..The Wombats Take Montreal
I worked at the Philadelphia Zoo for a short stint. A very short, heartbreaking stint. I wouldn’t treat my redheaded stepmother the way those animals are treated.
I’m pro-zoo, in some cases. In the cases where animals are nursed to health and re-released, but that isn’t the majority. I’m anti-zoo in the cases where animals are born and raised in small areas, never knowing anything other than a cage, eating foods that aren’t necessarily tailored for their digestive tracts. Exposed to climates and germs that aren’t quite right for them.
The conditions here in Philadelphia, one of the finest in the country, are deplorable for some of the animals. Some of the animals are just fine. But, the are all keep in conditions that completely acceptable and within standards. That’s sad. Diseases are rampant, even in the petting areas. Small animals are kept in the same boxes I keep my shoes in, and that’s okay. Legal. It’s horrifying.
We don’t go to the zoo.
Luckily, my child has “olfactory and audio sensitivity issues” (read: he’s a what we’d have called a “pussy” twenty years ago, but now there is a diagnosis) and can’t handle the smell and the noise, and has no desire to ever go back. Mention zoo to him and he flips out. That takes care of that for us.
I think that it can be a valuable experience for families. I used to love going to the zoo when I was little. I loved Sea World. I may or may not have a Shamu tattoo. (I do, I got it in the mid 90s when that stuff was cool. It’s not anymore. Whatever) I wouldn’t trade those memories for anything. But, I would ask parents to really take a look at the conditions of their local zoo before they start dumping dollars into it every summer. Where is your money going? Are you okay with that? I have this thing about where I put my money. I think everyone should. Maybe a good set of Zoo Books or whatever those things are called might be a little better for some families.
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This was his what – third kill?
That kills me.
Apparently shit happens.
And you keep on swimming with killer killer whales.
Who is the smarter species?
K. First, Jane the ref to the parkway driveway thing made me snort. And I was having a havarti and genoa salami sammie so although I was amused it turned out to be unpleasant…
Dan. Is that gnarly head actually in your house?? DIVORCE
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@JenJen – One time I thought it’d be funny to don the rug like I was a bear and go scare the kids.
I was on pee cleanup duty shortly afterward.
Yup. Real bear head. Attached to real bear skin, complete with real bear nails. Even our dogs lose their shit when they see it.
Here’s me with the bear:
Nice image. Thanks for that. I’m probably going to need ambien to sleep through the nightmares tonight.
I don’t think that zoos do anything to teach kids about the majesty and strength potential dangers of wild animals. In zoos they don’t look especially majestic, they aren’t doing anything other than lying around NOT demonstrating their strength, and they don’t seem remotely threatening. I concede that the intention could be there initially, but zoos just don’t do those things.
Why do I keep thinking of the Monty Python rabbit?
Jane´s last blog .."Who Wants To See A Resentful, Sulking Pole Dancer?" Me, That’s Who!
IT”S A FUCKING RHINO!!!I’m not a science teacher, but a social studies one. And this is what I yelled when we almost hit one with our car one very early morning driving to go fishing off the coast of South Africa. My nimrod companions wanted to stop and get photos. I graphically described the damage that rhino, and her ugly ass boyfriend, would do to our vehicle if we so much as put on the break for a ‘better shot.’ I like to think I took an active role in NOT being a moron that day (some days I manage better than others). I’m a dynamic teacher, btw.